2012 Preseason USA Today Coaches Poll (SEC SEC SEC)

The USA Today SIDs Coaches poll was released today, and I'm going to analyze it. (Note that someone over at USA Today needs to change the title of the page, as it still reflects last year's final poll).




Here's a pretty version that Reddit made.

I don't have any real issue with the top 3.

1) LSU is still loaded and a sack of oatmeal (or even Ryan Perrilloux) would be an upgrade over both Jarrett Lee and Jordan Jefferson, so Zach Mettenberger should be ok. LSU is an unusual team in that they were incredibly dominant last year, yet I can't name any offensive players other than the ones that sucked.

The more I look at their schedule, the less confident I am about them going through the regular season unscathed.

They face Washington OOC which shouldn't be an issue if Washington's D plays like they did in last year's Alamo Bowl.

They don't get any of the East cupcakes, with games at Florida and Auburn and Scar at home. Maybe Spurrier's team will finally live up to the hype and get them?

After those games, they have Bama at home, A&M on the road, and Arky on the road.

I don't have a real read on the Bama game. I would like LSU to win, but it's possible that Saban just broke Miles back in January.

A&M and Arky are both potential trap games. If SECRant is indicative, Aggie and Arky are the two most insecure fan bases in the SEC with the two biggest chips on their shoulders. Plus, Arky has done well recently against LSU whenever the Tigers travel to Fayettenam.


2) Alabama is just the worst. I consider last year's "title" wholly illegitimate and the fact that Garret Gilbert had Texas within 3 points late in the fourth quarter leads me to question the validity of 2009 as well.

Bama's schedule is a bit more favorable than LSU's.

I will be at the season opener against Michigan, as my brother goes to Bama. I think this game will be closer than people think, though the rash of injuries/suspensions that Michigan is experiencing may make me look like a fool.

After that, their toughest games are @Arky and @LSU. It's hard to see anyone else coming out of the SEC West.

3) I used to find Southern Cal pretty loathsome, but I like Matt Barkley and I would really enjoy it if someone outside of the SEC won a BCS title. Their offense was spectacular last year and the addition of Silas Redd from PSU can only make things better.

Their first interesting game is @Utah on October 4th (I expect them to roll Stanford). Utah is easily the second best team in the P12 South and the game is on a Thursday night. Home dogs on a Thursday night are usually a solid bet.

They get Oregon and Notre Dame at home, which are two winnable games. The tough part will be beating Oregon twice if they meet in the P12 championship.

4) I will be surprised if OU finishes with fewer than 2 losses. They just lost their starting center and, as of right now, have only one wide receiver with any experience currently on the roster. Unsurprisingly, Bob Stoops reinstated some suspended players after a juco WR transfer couldn't make the cut academically. They'll miss some games, but I imagine they'll have proved their remorsefulness before October 13th.

Their first conference game is at home against KSU. If the Sooner's offense is clicking yet, I can see the Snydercats taking a win in a low-scoring grind-it-out game.

Then they go to Tech, who seems to have their number. I expect the Red Raiders to be much improved this year, both because of the return to a more traditional defense and because they had an absurd number of injuries last year.

I don't know what to expect at the RRSO. I thought we would get crushed in 2010 and we played them to one score. I thought we would compete last year and it was one of the worst games of my life. This year, I'm hopeful that the Horns have a firmer understanding of Diaz's scheme and they'll prevent defensive atrocities like the 18 yard slant to Jaz Reynolds that opened the game last year.

Two weeks later they play the Domers. I expect that they'll be able to handle Notre Dame at home.

The Sooners have a rough three games to close out the season - @WVU, Ok State, @TCU. The national media seems pretty high on WVU right now, but I've noticed that the actual fans are more demure. They looked great in the Orange Bowl, but they also lost to Syracuse and Louisville last year. If OU @ WVU is for the Big 12 title, I expect WVU to triumph, if not, I think OU guts it out.

Ok State should be much weaker this year. I expect OU to handle them at home.

They close the season with TCU. This will be the biggest game of the year in Fort Worth and if the Frogs stay disciplined, they can definitely take down a lackluster OU team (see Baylor last year).

5) It's nice to see the Pac-12 with two teams in the top 10. The rest of the conference is basically worthless, but the two big dogs being in separate divisions ensures at least two premium match ups.

UO's schedule is just crazy easy. Unless Leach pulls off a major upset, the only challenge they face is USC. I would be very disappointed if they split the series with each other and somehow gave us another awful BCS Championship.

6) I have never seen a Georgia team live up the hype, and I don't expect that to start now. The SEC East is largely a dumpster fire, so their schedule is easy, but I could see them dropping their second game of the season @Mizzou and @Scar. Despite that, South Carolina has to play two tough West teams, so UGA will likely win the East.

They'll probably get 10 wins, but no conference title. (I could actually see them and Texas in the Cotton Bowl).

7) Florida State.

8) They'll probably drop the Bama game, but other than that, I think that this Michigan team will have a pretty easy time of it until they play Ohio State in what is essentially the Buckeye's bowl game. Regardless, they'll probably face Wiscy in the B1G title game.

9) Scar has a tougher schedule than UGA, as they have to face LSU and Arkansas. They should fare well against the East, but those two games could keep them out of the championship. I expect them to finish on the fringes of the top 15.

10) This seems very generous considering Arkansas' current coaching situation, but if you look at their schedule it does make some sense. Their toughest away game is @Scar, and they get Bama and LSU at home. I don't expect them to win those games, but Arky could still have a decent season without winning the West.

11) I want West Virginia to be good, but as I said earlier, some of those losses last year were real head scratchers. They have a new D-coordinator and likely a better grasp of Holgo's offense, so they definitely have potential. They moved the ball fairly well against LSU last year, but I don't know how they'll fare against the tougher defenses in the Big 12. @Texas on October 6 will probably decide how their season goes. Getting TCU and OU at home is a definite boon to their Big 12 title chances.

12) They lost Russel Shepherd and Paul Chryst, so Wiscy won't be as impressive as last year, but with PSU and tOSU unable to participate in the B1G title game, it seems inevitable that they represent the Leaders in that game.

13) Michigan State opens the season against Boise on Friday, which I'm very excited about. I think Boise wins that game, but it feels like it's been 15 years since they've played a game without Kellen Moore, so who knows how effective they'll be.

They play Notre Dame two weeks later in another loseable game.

In addition to the challenging OOC schedule, the Spartans have one of the tougher B1G schedules facing tOSU and Wiscy from the Leaders.

14) Clemson faces two SEC teams, Auburn opening weekend and Scar closing weekend. It's entirely possible that they beat Auburn, but Scar will probably be a tall order.

The ACC schedule is what it is. VT, GT, FSU, and Clemson will all look like world beaters one week and then drop a game to Wake Forest the next.

15) We face an SEC team in OOC play, which would be awesome, except that it's Ole Miss. The game is at 8:15 local time, so hopefully the confluence of all-day inebriation and supreme underdog status don't motivate the Rebels too much.

We open Big 12 play with a pretty rough stretch of @OSU, WVU, and OU. Things cool down considerably before we finish the season with TCU and @KSU.

The defense should be spectacular this year, and the combination of Brown-Bergeron-Gray should give us plenty of weapons in the running game. If David Ash recovers from his tweaked hamstring and can play competently then 10 wins will be a distinct possibility.

16) I don't know what to think of Nebraska this year. They lost one of the Screamin' Pelinis, so that should lower the team's collective blood pressure considerably. They're still starting Taylor Martinez and the defense has been pretty pedestrian post-Suh. I suspect they'll finish 3rd in the Legends.

17) TCU is another mystery. The drug bust hurt them and they lost to SMU's run and shoot last year. They'll be challenged by many of the spread offenses in the Big 12.

18) Stanford will be solid in the trenches, but the loss of Luck will probably keep them from contending with UO or USC.

19) OSU is breaking in a true freshman quarterback in Wes Lunt. Gundy has a proven track record of developing QBs and the defense should be effective, if not great. I think the Cowboys won't fall as far as most are expecting.

20) Essentially the same as Clemson. It'll be interesting to see how things shake out for a Hokie team that doesn't start the season in the top 10.

21) Kansas State is probably under ranked here. Their defense is stout and Collin Klein is a bulldozer. They got lucky in several close games last year, but maybe that's Snyder's old school discipline coming out. The cats should contend for a Big 12 title.

22) Petersen has proven that his teams can win no matter who the quarterback is. If the Broncos get by Michigan State they should be in a BCS game.

23) Florida will have a stout defense, an unproven quarterback, and an offensive coordinator from Boise. They're Texas from last year.

24) The Domers have a brutal schedule this year. I see at least five losses out of MSU, UM, Stanford, BYU, OU, and USC. They do kick off the season with a game in Ireland, so that's fun.

25) Pollsters got bored here and just decided to put an SEC West team in.

What Ever Happened to Raider Red?

Three weeks after upsetting #3 Oklahoma, and on the heels of a 66-6 dismantling by Oklahoma State, Texas Tech (5-5) is in danger of not being bowl eligible for the first time since 1992.

Upcoming games against Missouri and Baylor await Tommy Tuberville's team and, quite frankly, things don't look promising for the Red Raiders.

Despite losing leading rusher Henry Josey to the trifecta MCL, ACL, and patellar tendon tear, Mizzou was able to handle a resurgent Texas Longhorns squad last week.

Against Texas, the Tigers put up 17 points against the Big 12's stingiest defense. Texas Tech is ranked 113th in the nation in total defense. There will be blood.

While Baylor has been spotty this season (the Bears are only 3-3 in Big 12 play), head coach Art Briles and electric quarterback Robert Griffin III will be looking to finally topple the Raiders after a string of close games.

This Tech team was less of a paper tiger and more of a paper house-cat. No one expected them to be good, but I doubt anyone had any idea that they would be this bad.

They shouldn't be this bad -- but there were signs.

Early Season Concerns

Tuberville's squad began the season 4-0, with first year starter Seth Doege putting up huge passing numbers in offensive coordinator Neal Brown's offense. Through their first four games, the Red Raiders averaged over 47 points per contest, but numbers don't tell the whole story.

In the season opener against Texas State, Tech went into the half down 10-9 to former Big 12 foe Dennis Franchione.

The Red Raiders poured it on in the second half, winning 50-10. They followed up this performance with a throttling of New Mexico to the tune of 59-3.

It took a touchdown pass with 44 seconds left in the game for Tech to secure a 35-34 victory over Nevada. Maybe that's forgivable, Nevada runs a pistol offense, which can be difficult to defend if you're not familiar with it.

Next, Tech took on hapless Kansas. The Jayhawks held a 27-24 lead at halftime. A second half rally earned the Red Raiders a 45-34 victory, but 34 is the most that the Jayhawks have scored on a conference opponent.

Things Fall Apart

The Texas Tech/Texas A&M rivalry kind of flies under the radar, but these people hate each other.

Ever since this incident in 2001, the two fanbases have been at each other's throats.

The ire between the two schools was probably exacerbated by the 10-5 advantage Tech held over A&M in Big 12 play prior to this year, Mike Leach's open disregard for the passion and pageantry of Aggieland, and this year's fishbait debacle.

Despite Tech's Big 12 era dominance, Mike Sherman managed rattle off two wins a row against the Red Raiders, frustrating Tech's attempts to even up the overall series record.

All that to say, a victory over an experienced A&M squad would have been huge for the young Red Raiders.

Tech managed to hang with the Aggies for most of the game, with a chance to pull within five points late in the third -- only to have a field goal blocked and returned for a touchdown. Tech was never able to overcome the two touchdown deficit and fell to the Aggies 45-40.

Tech also lost leading rusher Eric Stephens for the year after a questionable hit. Stephens was a big part of the Red Raider offense, amassing 570 yards and 8 touchdowns prior to his injury.

Tech shouldn't have lost this game. A&M was reeling from two consecutive meltdown losses. Tech had them at home, in their last game as conference foes, and it was close.

Tech followed up the Aggie loss with another close home defeat.

Twilight of the Masked Riders

The Red Raiders were hanging tough with Kansas State, power towel enthusiasts and the surprise team of the Big 12. With two and half minutes left to play, Tech recovered an onside kick and had to drive 53 yards for a game tying touchdown.

It was right out of Friday Night Lights, or any number of Mike Leach engineered comebacks from the past 12 years.

Instead, the Red Raiders gained all of six yards and lost another winnable game 41-34.

Spirits low, decimated by injury, somehow, this Red Raider squad managed to limp into Norman and take down the Sooners 41-38.

Looking at the final score, you may think that Tech finally fought hard to the end and won a close game.

What really happened was that Tech almost managed to blow a 24 point lead after thoroughly dominating the Sooners in the first half. The Red Raider secondary laid down and the Sooners were a missed 28 yard field goal away from sending the game to overtime.

Ineptitude Incarnate

Over the past three weeks, the Red Raiders have been a different team.

A different, remarkably terrible team.

They've gone from a team with inconsistent execution to a team with absolutely no execution.

Tech has been outscored 159-33 over their last three contests. The Red Raider defense is physically overmatched and their formerly potent offense has been absolutely neutered.

The Red Raiders blew their best chance for a home conference victory by being blown out by perennial conference bottom-feeder Iowa State 41-7.

The next week, Texas housed them 52-20, compiling over 400 rushing yards in the process.

But both of those losses pale in comparison to the beat-down Oklahoma State laid on Tech.

Brandon Weeden and the Cowboys had their way with Tech defense, going up 49-0 at the half. When the carnage was finally over, Oklahoma State won 66-6.

I can't decide which better illustrates the sheer futility of Texas Tech football better right now. It's either this video of the worst special teams play I have ever seen.

Or, the fact that the only points Tech scored against Oklahoma State were on a fumble returned for a touchdown, after which the Red Raiders promptly missed the extra point.

In the face of such horrors, it's understandable that folks might act irrationally.

The Final Verdict

I don't know what to make of this Texas Tech team. I don't think Tommy Tuberville knows what to make of this Tech team.

There's no reason that a team that averaged 43 points a game over their first seven games should suddenly be incapable of putting up an offensive touchdown.

The offense that Brown runs is good. Doege is good. Tech's usual conglomeration of receivers are all good. Backup running backs Aaron Crawford and DeAndre Washington are good enough.

There haven't been any rumors of unrest in the Raider clubhouse. Last week, tight end Jace Amaro tweeted this:

It's as if an entire Division-I football team just forgot how to play.

The Red Raiders likely won't make a bowl this year, and I have no idea why.

9/10 College Football Liveblog

Yes! (Yes!)

Na na na na, na na na na, hey hey hey...

Three Games Back (The Debacle at Wrigley)

Games like last night's are what cause me to lose faith in the Astros. You go into Wrigley, you put up eight hits, you can't earn more than one run, and you lose in the most embarrassing fashion possible.

How is it that every time big fat Russ Ortiz is on the mound, everybody hits like an all-star, but when Wandy or Roy start we look like the girls in For Love of the Game.

Speaking of For Love of the Game.

Uncanny.


I realize that Zombrano is a decent pitcher, but come on, one run? If you're in sniffing distance of first place, why can we not squeeze out a single run in regulation to close the gap. Especially when playing the first place team in the NL Central. Never mind the fact that we have one of the most dominant, under the radar bullpens in the game.

They all must have glass arms as well, because god forbid they go more than two innings.

Hypothetical. You're the manager of team made up of mostly old players, picked up on the cheap, but your bullpen is excellent, with three guys pitching under a 3.00 era, and you're in a clutch situation that requires extensive pen work.

Do you:

A) Let your middle relief go and try to work out of a jam.
B) Keep your guys on a short leash but play small ball to eak out some runs
C) Panic and yank every reliever at the first sign of trouble, while your team of geriatrics tries desperately to keep pace with a streaking Cubs team.

If you answered C, congratulations, you're Cecil Cooper.

The worst part of this game was when we ran out of relief and had to turn to Chris Sampson, who, despite his decent record, gives up plenty of runs. Luckily, it was only the thirteenth inning of a tie ballgame, so it's ok to put out a guy who's not a fireballer.

I can only imagine that when they had the bases loaded and no one in the pen, Cecil felt just like Ellen Ripley after she couldn't shut down the base's self destruct sequence.

(Cecil in space, Newt is Chris Coste)

Hello World (An Introduction)

Welcome, Internet, to the first spin-off of Kyle's Magic Blog, hopefully this will be the Colbert Report to MB's Daily Show, and not Important Things with Demetri Martin. (Which was doomed to failure because Demetri is 30-freaking-5).

Regular readers of KMB (everyone) may know that I like sports, I write about them from time to time, mostly about baseball, and mostly about my high school dominance on the pitching rubber. (ERA: 3.18 Opponent's BA: 219 BB:13 K: 26 Record: 5-0, I plan to send these stats to Cecil Cooper in hopes of replacing Russ Ortiz in the rotation).

But, I like sports and athletes other than the ones I am involved in, mostly because I am not very good at anything athletic. I am good, however, at watching sports and critiquing the performance of people paid much more money than me. So, with that background, I have begun this new blog, where I will probable cover the following teams.







For the present time, you will see mostly coverage of the mighty Astros of Houston, because it is baseball season, and despite my jinxing their last two games with a "surge" twitter (and one of the most abhorrent starting rotations in all of baseball) I believe they will make a good second half run in a fairly weak NL Central.

Pre-season football also starts in two weeks, so I will be amping up for that soon, as well as potential discussions about my dominating fantasy team (The Magical Wizards).

I expect that, as college football (my favorite sport) starts, and the Astros inevitably choke in the playoffs, my coverage will lean pretty heavily to the Longhorns and other Big XII teams, as well as other favored CFB topics, including, but not limited to, Erin Andrews, Jorts, the joke that is the Pac-10, and Herbie's prowess with young co-eds.

In addition to promoting the exploits of the teams I enjoy, I will also take many opportunities to denigrate teams that I dislike. (Take that region that is different than the one I am in/support!).







I felt that I should let you readers know where my loyalties lie, not getting caught up in the assumption that, being from West Texas, I will cheer for the debacle in Dallas or the baseball team that has won all of one playoff game in its entire existence.

I suspect the majority of my snark will be directed at these brave soldiers, defending their hallowed halls from liberal ideas, colored people, and pretty girls.

(Note: this image was found by searching "Texas a&m corps + gay" it was far from the only result)